A New Year, A New Season

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Typically I like the start of a new year.

New goals, new dreams, new lists – I’m totally into all that stuff.

With the start of this new year however, I’m just not so sure.

Yes I’ve got some new goals I’m excited about and I’ve chosen a word for the year that I’m happy with, but what this year holds that many before it have not, is some really big changes.

2016 is going to bring about a new season for me and I’m not certain yet how I feel about it.

I like rhythm and routine. I like structure, and I like knowing what’s happening next.

I can’t foresee all of those things for this year and that worries me.

This spring we’ll be moving my dad from the care facility he’s lived in for the past 16 years in Southern California, to an assisted living facility right here in Washington.

This is a huge change that will ultimately affect my entire family and our day to day lives – and honestly, I’m terrified.

Think of me what you will – but it’s been a long time since I’ve lived so close to my dad and now his doctor appointments, visits to the dentist, and trips to the grocery store to stock his fridge will now fill my calendar.

I think I’m also afraid because it’s a part of my life that I have let very few people into.

I am incredibly protective of my dad. How he’s treated, how’s he talked about, how’s he’s viewed.

With his move here, he will become a bigger part of my world, a part of my church, and more a part of my life, as well as my kids’ lives.

It’s going to be a big change.

Not only will my dad’s move be taking place this year, but this fall will also lead to a big change for our family.

My oldest son Carter will start middle school in the fall, and my baby girl will be enrolled in all day kindergarten.

I am SO not ready for any of this.

Although Carter is one of the brightest, most kind, considerate, kids I know – I am not ready for him to go to middle school.

Middle school is scary, teachers give too much homework, and teenage girls are mean.

At least that’s how I remember it.

Honestly I know he’s going to be fine (or at least that’s what I’m praying) it’s more myself that I’m worried about.

And don’t even get me started with London starting Kindergarten…

Currently Lunny is in preschool at our church and she absolutely loves it. Each day she and I leave the church at 1:00, and for the next four hours or so, it’s just the two of us together. We grocery shop, or do our tri-weekly trip to Target, so just go home and hang out – just the two of us.

I love our afternoons together, and I’m not ready to give them up.

Because what am I supposed to do with myself each day when my kids are in school until 3:30?

Seriously, I have no idea what I’m going to do, and I don’t like that.

 

So this is where I’m at.

A new year that’s going to bring about a new season for me and I’m not completely sure I’m ready.

I do however find extreme comfort in knowing that I won’t be taking even one step of it alone.

I know that the Lord has brought me to this new season, I know that He has been preparing me for it, and I know that He is going to lead me through it every step of the way.

I’ve also been quite blessed with a crazy awesome husband that has been, and will always be by my side through whatever we go through. DJ has been so great with every little detail that comes along with caring for my dad and I know that will never stop. I also know that on the very first day of school, when the kids are off to their new schools and I’m simply doing my best to not have a panic attack – DJ will take me to Starbucks, and to the mall and I’ll go on a crazy fun shopping spree just to make it through the day!

I’m also super thankful for my three kiddos. They drive me nuts at times, but I have no doubt they’re going to be extremely helpful when their grandpa moves here and is spending more time with us.

So here we go friends.

A new year, a new season.

I say bring it on!

 

Oh and by the way, if you want to get together for coffee sometime, or work on a Pinterest project together, or hit up Target – I’m going to have some free time starting in September :)